On Sunday I posted up picture on Instagram. The caption read: ‘When purpose meets purpose’. So many people were diggin’ the caption, probably more than the photo lol. But that’s great, because it means that they might have caught onto the deeper meaning behind my caption. I’d like to expand on it just a little bit for today’s newsletter by asking you, is there such a thing as ‘the one’?
A great number of us have been sold a dream about finding ‘the one’, with the Hollywood or Nollywood storyline of love…and they all lived happily ever after, even with the crazy mother in-law Mama G (joke for the Nollywood fans).
For this part of the newsletter, when I say ‘the one’, I’m coming from the viewpoint where people see ‘the one’ as the perfect person in that moment. So, He’s ‘the one’ for me because He is tall, caramel skinned, well educated and buys me gifts every week. She’s ‘the one’ for me because, she’s beautiful, has straight teeth, her hair is always 100, cooks for me, plays Xbox and she’s ambitious etc.
He or She might be ‘the one’ for you today, but what do you do when they fail to meet your criteria for ‘the one’? If he stops buying you gifts every week or fails an academic exam, or if she has bad hair day, or gets a chipped or missing tooth because of an accident (extreme lool I know, following my example above) – do they stop being ‘the one’?
The notion of finding ‘the one’ based on feelings or aesthetics is inconsistent, extremely risky and a set-up for disappointment. It leaves no room for the flaws that exist in all of us. People with this understanding of ‘the one’, FLEE when ‘the one’ shows any sign of imperfection.
‘The one’ for us in God’s eyes isn’t necessarily the person who we initially see as ‘perfect’, it is ‘the one’ that He knows will help us fulfil our purpose here on Earth.
So yes, I believe there is such a thing as ‘the one’. However, what I’m saying is that our selection of ‘the one’ should not be based on our ever-changing ‘feelings’. It should be based on Purpose (def. the reason for which something is done or created or for which something exist)!
So, Instead of trying to find ‘the one’. Find PURPOSE!
It is ‘purpose’ that will cause you to see beyond the imperfections of that person.
Purpose keeps a relationship together even when you don’t ‘feel’ like staying.
Purpose sees beyond the limitations at present.
Purpose will keep you going.
This is not a charge for people to stay in abusive (emotionally and physically) relationships. God is not the author of confusion. Know what is merely good and what is God. Purpose reflects scripture and not flesh.
Feelings come and then feelings go. Those who build their relationships on the foundation of “feeling” will find that when the rain comes, their love quickly crumbles. – Relevant Magazine
Dating & Courtship
‘Dating is a selection process, to determine whether a person is the right one through compatibility and ‘feel good’ approaches.’
‘Courting is a Choosing God’s Best or God’s Word-based selection process – to measure the person based on Christ-likeness & suitability’.
‘Dating teaches breaking up as a means to resolve issues’, when the other falters at any point on your perfect criteria’.
‘Courtship teaches making up, restoration, reconciliation, forgiveness, and unconditional love.’
Dating will highlight all the qualities the person doesn’t have, all their flaws. Courtship will see those flaws turn into strengths!
I can testify that courtship is challenging yet incredible when done in the right way.
There needs to be an understanding that if Christ is in your relationship then you must acknowledge Him first and He will direct your paths. Grow together in the Vision of God for your lives. Do not allow the enemy to divide you but be unified through commitment, loyalty, and purity first. God bless you and have a purpose filled week!
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To find out more about this thing called purpose in a relationship and how to know if a potential partner will aid you in fulfilling your purpose, check out Sister Frances Okoro’s blog post, as she also beautifully expounded on my now famous Instagram caption ‘when purpose meets purpose’.
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Published by Kanayo Dike-Oduah
Kanayo is a Multi-award winning, Author and Senior leader in education whose experience ranges from being a Deputy Head of Sixth Form, Head of Psychology and Lead Practitioner. Kanayo believes that these 3 elements are the driving force of her ministry and career. D.I.G; Drive, Integrity and Grace.
Having a psychology degree provides me with a broad scope to experience many industries and fields of work. Although, my main aim is to continuously learn and also to share my knowledge and experience with others, within and beyond the constraints of the psychology community. Hence my pursuit to teach!
Hopefully, the readers of this blog will find that it is infested with a scope of psychological knowledge, with the intention of conveying psychology in such a way that it is interesting and understandable to those who aren’t studying it as a discipline. In addition, you will find that I heavily cover various topics aside of psychology such as, Christianity because I am a Christian. I draw both passions together, Psychology and Christianity, observing how they complement and sometimes clash! This blog is where ‘Psychology meets Scripture’.
As well as teaching Psychology, I know God has called me to do something far greater in this world. My passion is for His Word and to encourage others to read the Bible, fall in love with it, but most importantly…fall in love with The Author! My role of teaching is not limited to psychology. I strongly believe God is stirring up the ‘teacher’ office of the Five fold ministry in me.
I’m a doctor by virtue, healing and performing heart surgery with words of encouragement.
I am extremely driven and passionate about getting everyone; both Christians and non-Christians to read, understand and live out the word of God. To achieve this, I’ve created online Bible Challenges, whereby people around the world via social media, read a book in the Bible, one chapter a day and share what they have drawn out from the text. I have numerous Bible challenges, all accessible from my blog (www.doctorkanayo.com) and the YouVersion Bible App where over 250,000 people have completed my devotionals around the world. One Bible Challenge at a time, I aim to change the skewed perceptions of the Bible being irrelevant and to show the true reality that the bible is ‘juicy’, tremendously relevant, fun and easy to read. My one prayer is that my teachings and writings from His word, will touch at least ONE person. That would be a serious mission accomplished to the glory of God!
If you have anything you would like me to blog about, do let me know by either commenting, or contacting me via my contact form.
Thank you for visiting my blog. With love, Kanayo x
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7 thoughts on “When Purpose Meets Purpose”
Wow! this is knowledge-packed. The one will help you fulfil my individual purpose, joint purpose and kingdom purpose. This statement stood out for me. God bless you and increase his revelation of himself to you, to continue being a blessing. Amen.
Thank you for this article, it blessed me.