‘Gaslighting’ is a complex, nuanced term that many have experienced or perpetuated. If you have ever been made to question the validity of your faith, your perception of reality, your lived experiences and feelings; you may have been a victim of gaslighting. In a grace-resistant world full of post-truths, we must learn how to deal with gaslighting by returning to the Truth of God’s Word.
It was an incredible honour to partner with my sister Ruth Oladeru on this devotional titled 'Why Worry? Here we explore the origin of worry and how to address it by drawing upon scripture and psychology. This 6-day devotional is available on YouVersion. In this devotional we define what worry is, discuss ways to overcome … Continue reading ‘Why Worry?’ – Devotional on YouVersion
Worry is a chain of thoughts and images, negatively laden and relatively uncontrollable; it represents an attempt to engage in mental problem-solving on an issue whose outcome is uncertain but contains the possibility of one or more negative outcomes to the point of debilitating the ‘worrier’ in a state of anxiety.Definition of Worry adapted from … Continue reading Psychology Meets Scripture on the topic of ‘worry’ #MentalHealthAwarenessWeek
“Forgiveness does not negate accountability” It is not un-Christian to hold someone or an organisation accountable when they have stepped out of line.
Forgiveness does not excuse the offending behaviour. Forgiveness excuses the offender. The fact that God forgives us of sin, does not make sinning okay. The fact that we forgive someone of their sin towards us, does not make the sin okay.
Hearing ‘I’m sorry’, ‘I messed up’, ‘I feel terrible for what I did’ is like music to our ears. It feels good when someone acknowledges their wrongdoing towards you and oftentimes it makes it much easier to forgive them, right? But what if they never apologise. The reality is that some people will never apologise for their wrongdoing towards you, and waiting on them to apologise before you forgive will cost you your mental freedom. This is why we must LEARN TO FORGIVE, EVEN WITHOUT AN APOLOGY.
The psychology of memory can explain why ‘forgiving and forgetting’ is rarely the case! Our memories are so powerful and a single experience can become entrenched in our long-term memory to the point that it becomes a cue for future expectations.
Remembering an event, a situation, or a person can evoke a shiver of excitement, the heat of anger, or the anguish of grief. Although emotion that is activated by a memory may not be felt as intensely as the actual experience, the recall can be enjoyable or painful nonetheless. Thankfully, the command is to forgive and not necessarily to forget, because let’s face it — it is virtually impossible to forget certain experiences whether good or bad.
This devotional is where ‘psychology meets scripture’ on the topic of forgiveness. Oftentimes, we passively forgive an offender, with a simple ‘I forgive you’, however, the challenge comes when you are reminded of their offence every time you see them. Or when you find it hard to get rid of that negative memory. Sometimes these recurring memories and feelings make you question whether you have really forgiven them or not.
Wow, 365/365! What a year 2019 has been. Many will say ‘she had a really bad, tough, hard year’. My response to them is 2019 has been the most incredible year of my life thus far. It is a year that I can fully say, finishing with life is more important than finishing with accolades. … Continue reading Finish 2019 Empty!